Saturday 25/9/10 - Can you get addicted to the Temple? and Do I ever shut up?

So today I think I made up for my lack of things done over the last few days by having a YSA Temple Day and Baptism all in one day! Feeling very uplifted.

Which brings me to my question - Can you get addicted to the Temple? I love it there so much I don't want to leave. Today was awesome. I took a wrong turn but ended up finding a new way to get there anyway. Today was YSA Temple Day nationwide for the performance of "Temple Ordinances". Next up we have a national fast sunday for "Sacrifice" all leading up to Convention as part of Reach Up, Reach Out, Stand Up, Stand Out! It feels so good to be part of something bigger than yourself, to know that we are all in this together. I mean I know that anyways, but it's nice to have a reminder. I met a bride today woooo. Very pretty dress, and she looked so happy and content. I met another guy going to recieve his endowments, he's getting married in 2 weeks. He lives in Lismore in New South Wales which is about a 3 hour drive away. Closer for them to come to the Brisbane Temple than Sydney which is about 9 hours away. We are so lucky to be less than an hour away from ours. And I met an RM, an Aussie, went to the Adelaide-Darwin mission, and came back with an american accent lol. Funny, lovely guy though. Just got back two weeks ago. People you see and things you do at the Temple!

I was typing the program for the baptism and realised I havent been to a baptism since Alan's in June! It was really good, not as good as mine obviously but no one's will ever be lol :p. Peter is solid. It started late though due to technical difficulties AKA the white pants didnt fit lol. Elder Scurti gave a great talk about Faith and Repentance. It was the first time ever anyone's put it across in a way that I truly got it, sorry Michael lol. I told him so at the end and thanked him for the speech and he acted like no one had ever thanked him before :( A little girl got up last sacrament and said how she sends thank you notes to the speakers, I really think I should start doing it. These people need to know the difference they're making in people's lives so they keep doing it.

So I dont know what's with some people here, they are so hot and cold. It's not that they are nasty or anything, it's just sometimes you just don't know where you stand, one minute they're all happy and lovey, next they're all "hey" and cold shoulder. I've been missing Utah heaps today, guess because I've been talking about it alot today, people have been asking, they've heard rumours that Im moving to the States. I can't believe the amount of gossip. I've told a handful of people im moving and suddenly everyone knows. I've had 4 emails and 4 phone calls from work friends today. And I've had three people ask me from church today! But yeah I've been missing the feeling of being accepted, wanted, appreciated, loved :( And I don't want to sound ungrateful, I've had good things happen and have good friends around me, it's just not the same as living with Katie and the family though. Maybe I'm just being greedy, but how it felt there is how I want to feel always.

I've finally found my CV, phew thought I'd really lost it but alas I cannot find my Degree. Nearly have it all ready to go now. Im thinking it's taken me way to long to get it organised but like my Mum said to me I always have a million things on the go, she nearly said I was overcomitted, nearly lol. I would so dearly love some time to sit down and make some plans on paper. There is way too much "if, buts and maybes" floating around in my head and thats when I get into trouble, because I start to just go along with whatever is said first and before you know it I'm on a path I don't want to be going down (eg: Grad program in the Operating Theatre). To add to the mix I'm thinking of doing my post grad teaching next year before I go, I was looking at my academic transcirpt and maybe I'm only thinking this because it's been nine months since I was studying last, but I did really well and don't remember it being that hard?

Thomas (my eldest cousin, my "big bro") and Ruthy (his fiancee) rang me this morning at 4.45am thanks for that lol and I could not get back to sleep. Jo and Ritcho (my two other cousins causing havoc travelling across europe) have just arrived in Scotland so it was awesome to talk to them too. LOVED chatting to Ruthy. Remember how I said they are real straight in Scotland, say it as it is, no beating about the bush? Well I loved to hear what Ruth had to say about the whole falling out with friends and my plans to move to the States. Very frank. They've bought a new house, 4 beds, so I am most welcome to visit Ruthy said! Yay. She wants mum and dad to go too now they have a place for them. Mum and Dad are thinking of moving to Hervey Bay since they've heard of my plans. Sounds really nice what they were looking at, water views. Kemy, Katie, Michael, Brandon, you can visit the great barrier reef in a day trip from there, so it would be a good move for you guys too lol.

So Im so tired and the baptism ran way late so I missed the engagement party I was going to tonight but theres no way I would have made it driving there and back. I hope they still love me lol. I've been patiently waiting for the October Ensign to come out on the web because I am to teach RS lesson next week and it's supposed to be on the VT message. Well turns out hello its conference which = special issue = no VT message! So even better, the special issue is about family and temples, so I get to teach on Temples! Woooo hoooo cause I am so on fire with the Temple right now!

Heres the moon tonight my only company, look how much I've written, everything other than what i ate for breakfast, man I need someone to talk to. On the positive side, I'm doing really well at keeping this journal, don't know if my posterity will care about my 5am phone calls or what lessons I teach but meh. Ok lets just call a spade a spade and say I'm totally missing Utah and everyone and everything in it and that's why I am blabbering on about everything else to try and avoid it xox

Friday 24/9/10 - Missionaries for dinner...

Today seemed to disappear running around doing things but I don't feel I got that much done. I hate days like that. I feel I'm going to need a job soon, not just for financial reasons but because I'm feeling like I'm not getting much out of my days. So silly, as soon as Im at work I'll be wishing I was back at this point. Hmm then again maybe not, I've changed a little bit from how I used to be. I got a message from Katie though yay! Happy Birthday! I have had heaps of friends from work ringing me to find out all the goss about why I resigned, apparently I made the newsletter lol. Interesting. Everyone has said how happy I sound, one friend said I sound like I'm glowing when I was telling her about Utah and everyone and everything that happened. I told her to wait till she sees me, she'll need sunnies :P. I spent some time working on the Tshirts for Elder Thunots surprise Sunday, they rock! Turns out we might not be able to have an actual bonfire because of fire restrictions :( Bummer. But we will still go ahead, we shall have to toast our marshmallows over a candle, don't laugh, I've done it before :).

So today I was googling for some images for the program im typing up for Peters baptism tomorrow and I found two blogs for Elders out on their mission right now that are being kept up to date by their family. Was such a cool find. And I've been inspired. I'm going to start a study schedule to try and help me get on track with my daily scripture reading. Looking forward to it.

Had a great dinner with the missionaries tonight. Our new Elders are great, Elder Scurti is from Colorado and funny as anything, Elder Correy is from Canada and really quiet, but nice. Mum was so funny, they came in and she was like "Oh I haven't seen you's in ages!" Was so nice to see. Ok so its a pretty bad picture but I can't find my camera :( so this is off my phone. I'm just pretty amazed my parents are standing with the missionaries lol.

This is Elder Merrill with the mama of the friend I made yesterday - ah love the missionaries adventures.

Thursday 23/9/10 - Missionary dinner tomorrow!

Do you like my little friend I found today under the rubbish bin?

So other than exploring for frogs, today I started working again on my CV and applications. I'm going to start with Agency applications. I can't commit to a long term position anywhere so it doesn't feel right to apply unless I find something casual locally, which I'll look for too. I don't want to take on something I can't commit to.

My Uncle James and Aunty Carmel came to visit today which was lovely. Hey guess what my Uncle James has quit smoking, cold turkey, since Saturday. He looks soooo good, with that and a holiday and a shave I swear he looks 10 years younger and so fresh. Cait you would so see the difference, dang I should have taken a photo for you!

Missionary dinner tomorrow night and guess what? We have a baptism Saturday yay! I'm so excited. His name is Peter and I don't know the full story yet but it is one of those "meant to be" ones that I love love love so much. So Elder Jensen and Elder Lundt met him in on the street in Chermside and he was interested in hearing more so they referred him onto Elder Thunot and Elder Prina. They went to his street one day and saw this man who was moving house struggling to move furniture by himself and offered to help. The man says "hey I know you boys", and they said "hey are you Peter?" and it was him! Poor guy was trying to move house by himself, so the boys ended up helping out of course. And if they had gone just one day later he would have moved and he would have been lost! But they found him and then they started teaching him and now he's getting baptised. He only came to church for the first time two weeks ago! Way to go Peter! I'll be there with bells on, it's been a couple of months since I went to a baptism :)

So I'm thinking of going to Convention. It looks sooo good AND it's the last one for three years AND I'll be 30 next year and you have to be under 30 AND you have to be single and hopefully I wont be single in 3 years lol AND i have no other plans for New Years, it'll be cool to do something spectacular rather than the same old fireworks on the beach. Its 5 days, 4 nights accommodation in Sydney at Rosehill Gardens, they're going to build from scratch a whole YSA Village.

• Thursday is registration and opening ceremony


• Friday is activities and workshops then NYE ball


• Saturday is sun surf and sand followed by Saturday Night Live


• Sunday is Sunday services, service project, Sunday roast fast breaker, musical fireside and testimonies


• Monday is still to be figured out.

Looks like a blast! My friend Tara is coming too and hopefully Honey, and we can all take a road trip down together! Brisbane to Sydney is 1000km, 12 hours drive, not quite Utah to Washington Katie but nearly lol.

Got my tickets for Ingrid Michaelson! Shes so good, Ive converted Honey now too :)

Wednesday 22/9/10 - I thnk I've figured it out...

I've been trying to figure out what's been different, why can't I be as happy here as I was in Utah. And today I was driving to the Temple and a guy walking past smiled at me. Then it clicked, nobody has smiled at me for ages! Like really just a nice friendly smile. I was spoilt, I was getting that 24/7, so I'm really missing it!

This is our Brisbane Temple

I had another amazing time at the Temple again tonight. Every time it's been something different. I've decided that I'm going to keep a journal just of my temple experiences, I don't want to forget any of it!

The sky tonight over the Temple

Now where was I in the top 20 countdown...

Photo 2 of the Top 20

This is Michael aka Elder Nielsen at the 1/4 mark when we went hiking up Mt Timpanogos to get to the caves. It is the second highest mountain in Utah's Wasatch range. It was amazing. The view was so good, the hike was so steep, but totally worth it. The caves at the top were even more amazing. I know we have caves here but I've never been in one. It was so cool. There was this one part where they turn off all the lights and it is pitch black, there is literally no light. I had my hand in front of my face and hit myself in the face because I had no concept of space. It was amazing, I couldn't get my head round it.







But the reason this is a special photo is because whilst I was nearly dying huffing and puffing up the mountain, Michael talked to me about the Temple, he jumped at the chance to put his missionary hat back on. It was the perfect setting for such a discussion, I mean really, just us, one RM, one convert, peace and quiet, on the side of a mountain, in Utah, talking about the Salt Lake Temple. It was great. And then after we had done the caves, the ranger, now wait her name was something so American, Becky! Ranger Becky had just got back off her mission, so asked me to share my story. And there was another man there who was helping out, kind of an off duty ranger and he was about to go on his mission with his wife. And so the hike back Michael and I got to tell my story, it was so cool because I would tell my part from my point of view and then he would tell his part from the missionary point of view, was very cool. So there we were, bearing testimonies about the temple and missionary work on the top of a mountain in Utah. It was the BEST!

(This is not my photo but its the view from the top of Mt Timpanogos, I didnt go that far lol, but you can see why I want to move to this country hey!)

Tuesday 21/9/10 - Coming to terms...

So today I resigned. I dont feel elated and I dont feel worried, I just feel like I'm back to how I felt before I went back there which is happy. Onward and upwards then.

Tonight I went to institute at KP with a few friends and went to the Eternal Marriage prep course that my friend was going to, how funny! Now all of a sudden all these girls are trying to set me up on dates. But the cutest thing was a couple up the back at the end of the class announced that they had become engaged the day before thanks to the class! How sweet. It was a great night with friends, I really enjoyed it. We were learning about Temple prep, and the teacher explained how the whole focus of the church is the Temple, I loved it!

I loved this quote from Jospeh Smith

"I teach them correct prinicples, they govern themselves"

I love to know that I have the freedom and responsibility to choose not just in church matters but in all things in my life. This was a really good lesson because it helped me feel clear about my choice to resign. We talked about the important decisions in life that you take to the temple. One person said career and job choices. The teacher went onto suggest that it doesnt matter in the eternities what you do here, whether your a professor or the garbage man, as long as you do your duties well and live righteously and to your potential. You use your talents. What does matter is if your happy doing what you are doing in your life. If your not happy then your not on your path.

Sometimes he said we get so caught up by wanting God to guide our every move that we are not willing to take the steps ourselves. That's how I felt about all the indecision surrounding this choice. It was like I was waiting for a sign, something to happen to say, OK do this or do that. But I wasn't making any decisions myself, or taking any steps in any direction.

He taught that if it's not essential to your eternal progression, you make the decision and then take it to the Lord. So that's what I've done. And now after learning all this I feel much more content about it. I've resigned and closed that door, now I'll seek for new opportunities and I'm sure I will be guided in those choices. What more can you ask for?

Monday 20/9/10 - Make a decision already!

I went back to work today, and I hated it. I could feel my happiness draining from me as the day dragged on. The best parts were lunch and when everyone came to say hi as they realised I was back. Since that won't last, neither will I at this job. I've been thinking and thinking and thinking over and over and over it and I am soooo way over thinking about it. (and talking about it, poor Honey! Thanks for listening!)

I wrote down a list of pros and cons. While their are negatives to me resigning, their are many more positives. I started writing down words to describe how I feel when I wrote among other things "Confusion and indecision". That's when I realised I needed to decide and not "think" about it for another day. All this thinking was just turning into a hidden way of saying procrastination and driving me nuts. I didn't even feel like I could say the prayer for FHE tonight cause my head was not in the right space. Not good.

"Worrying is like a rocking horse...it keeps you moving but it gets you nowhere"

So I've decided to resign. I was going to write a million things here to explain my decision, but I feel now that it's made, it's made and I don't need to expain it and go over and over it. A funny thing happened tonight. I went downstairs to talk about it with my Mum and Dad and I was amazed because she listened and she didnt disagree, and there were points were I would normally go off the deep end when Dad disagreed with me and we'd end up arguing about it, but I stayed calm, and it made such a difference. She just wanted to know in the end, for their new house, do they include me in the plans or not? No mum, I really am moving to Utah. I don't think she's quite got it yet :)

So tomorrow I'll hand in my resignation and be done with it. Now I can move on and start looking forward to what's next. I have an excited feeling when I think about looking for a position and updating my CV and going for interviews. So I think that's a good sign.

Thats the end of that!

Sunday 19/9/10 - Whoa!

What a day it was at church today! I got to catch up with so many people and I loved it. I was blown away by the awesome sacrament talks. There's this one man who is always up the back and sleeps alot, well when I saw him on the stand, my expectations were not that high and I wondered what he was going to deliver for us. This is his story, I must share, it was soooo good.

"Picture this. Close your eyes if you like. There's a young man. He's sitting, waiting. It's drizzling rain. He looks around and settles back down. Waiting. He sees a man walking toward him along the road. He's not young, he look's old. When he see's him closer, he realises, he's not old, just ancient. The young man asks "Have you got it?". The Ancient man hands him a map. The young man takes it and unscrolls it and looks closely. He sees an X that marks the spot. He sees many paths and roads that he has travelled already. He hears the ancient man walking away and calls out to him. The Ancient one turns and tosses a book at him. The young man and Ancient one go on their ways.

We look and see there's a man on a path. It's coming to an end. He's the young man, but he's old now. He's travelled many paths and roads, crossed icy rivers, climbed the highest of mountain peeks and back down to the pits of them again. He has his map. And X marks the spot. He comes to a door. It's locked. He tries to open it but to no avail. He sits and cries out. A lifetime leading to this, a locked door. The Ancient One appears. The young man cries out pleading "Do you have the key". The Ancient one answers "Did you read the book?"

Oh my gosh I love this soooooooo much I have goosebumps writing it and remembering it said today. Ok so the map is the Gospel and the book is the Scriptures. The Scriptures are the standard by which we live. As we do so we can live the doctrine, fullfill the covenants, and recieve the keys to unlock the doors and receive the joy that we so desire.

And that was just the second talk in sacrament! The day went on to get better and better when I saw a newly baptised man and his wife return after some time away from church yay! They shared their story which was even more faith affirming. I got to go to my gospel principles class which I had been missing :) And we have three new investigators! Great work missionaries! Then onto RS. I felt so out of practice today lol, well it has been nearly 2 months since I've been to my ward. The RS President took on board some of my suggestions and used them today which was great, nice to know she is listening and willing to give things a go, thats all you can ask of someone right? That they listen and give you a chance - I appreciated it. We had a great lesson and I learnt alot of new things about the Church in ancient times and how Jesus Christ has and always will be the centre of his church, that this is not about the works of men, we are led by Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ. I loved it!

Afterward it was off to see the missionaries and give them the meal roster. We're having them over for Dinner Friday! Yaya missionary dinners oh how I've missed you! I'm excited :). The new companion of Elder Thunot is Elder Scurti, he has a real Brooksby vibe and I think he's going to be great for Redcliffe, funny as and a real people person. Anyways he was trying to convince me to check out Colorado before deciding on Utah as a place to move to. Too late sorry :). Im sure Colorado's nice and all and I will visit, but Utah it is. It was great catching up with them all. Then off to choir practice - oh what a crack up that was, worth going just for the laughs if nothing else.

Angela (RS First Counsellor and previously mentioned Yuri, his mum) took me aside today and asked me if I was joining the Choit. She and I have been getting really close since I came back from the States which is lovely. She then went onto to tell me how this will be so wonderful for me and that when I get to the states I must join a choir and sing in the Temple. Imagine that. She told me not to waste a second of my time in the states, to jump right in and experience it all. Well, that's exactly what Im planning to do, jump right in, experience it all. I cant wait!

Lunch with Honey after church today. Honey couldn't come today so the poor thing got to hear all about it from me, for hours lol. Then the missionaries came round to borrow her guitar to practice for this Sunday. And Elder Thunot told us that he is leaving early. Three weeks he has then he's home! I cant believe it, it was supposed to be November! Anyways that means game on now for me and Honey to organise his send off ASAP. We're having a Fireside Bonfire this Sunday at Helen's - I think this will be his send off, we've got a plan, should be fun, will try and record it and post a video or two :). I got to play with her guitar today too. First time I've ever had a go and I LIKE it. Now I want to buy one and learn how to play.

Tonight Honey and I made a delish Karen Sue inspired salad from the aforementioned healthy food bought yesterday. Can't wait to try it for lunch tomorrow. Was so much fun in my kitchen cooking away, with all my lovely new knives :). Then tonight a good chat with my friend Tara! Boys I tell you drive us girls nuts sometimes. I feel your pain Sista! Patience is a virtue as they say, when all other avenues are exhausted, it's our only option sometimes. And Tara, you're one of those new friend opportunities I was talking about, I'm really glad you're in my life too, glad the missionaries found you too!

Work tomorrow 9am - enough said :( - nah trying to be positive, a 9am start is not bad hey? We shall see how it goes soon enough.

Saturday 18/9/10 - Brisbane Temple

I had the most beautiful morning at the Temple today. It was a super early start to pick up my sisters as we were going today as the RS Presidency. I am really grateful and committed to my calling ever since going to Utah and seeing the people there commit to theirs. I dont know why there commitment struck me more than here but for some reason it sunk in. So I've come back with a whole different attitude toward my calling and the Presidency.

We arrived and I was so excited again just like in Salt Lake that I wanted to scream. When I went to the Salt Lake Temple, I love love loved it but I was torn, because I wanted to stay there forever, but I wanted to get out and scream from the rooftops how happy I was, and I knew I couldn't do that inside lol. It literally feels like im going to burst! It was an awesome morning and I cant believe the revelation you recieve. Like I thought I was already close to God, but in the Temple, man! I got another confirmation! And it makes me feel high as a kite! And Steve Fazakerley came too, it was sooo good that he was there! There was something I wanted to participate in, but wasnt sure if I could the first time in Salt Lake, and then when I knew I could, there was soooo many people at Mt Timpanogos that I was like oh well next time. And then it came time again and I was like all shy and like "Oh no, i'll do it next time" and Steve was like in the loudest whisper you've ever heard "Alexis!" and waving me on, so I was like "aye aye captain", but that's why I was so grateful Steve was there, guiding me again as he always does.

Speaking of Mt Timpanogos, I read this story on a facebook page the other day. It went like this. A man was in the Mt Timpanogos Temple and saw a picture of the mountains on the wall. He said out loud but to no one in particular, "I wonder why they have a picture of the mountains when I can just walk outside and see them". A Temple worker heard him and answered "Because this Temple will be standing long after those mountains are gone". Think about that for a minute and see if it doesn't blow your mind, it did mine. I really related to it because I was like "Hey! I've been there! I've seen those mountains, in fact I was inside that mountain!"

(The view of the mountains from Mt Timpanogos Temple)

So Steve for those of you who dont know him (and you are obviously not cool enough because all the cool people know Steve Fazakerley lol :P), Steve is an awesome guy that I met through Church. He was at my Baptism, and he was my Home Teacher. Michael used to always tell me about this guy in the ward who I should meet because he was always so on fire and learning from the scriptures all the time and that he would text the missionaries with new insights everyday. I was like sure I want to meet him! We met at my Baptism and he told me he was to be my Home Teacher - what a "coincidence" :p I remember thinking he was such a happy guy. He and my friend Yuri (Yuri's on his mission now, I am proud to say, I was his guinea pig) would come over and home teach me. They would come every week and teach me all the new member lessons. I remember it was funny because Maree (Maree my friend and roommate that introduced me to the church - a whole other story) would want us to have the lessons outside cause Steve was so loud :) He has a booming voice, but I love that, it makes Steve Steve. Steve would ring me every week to see how I was going. Then he and Katherine decided to move and had to leave the ward. Do you think that stopped Steve? Nope he still rings me once a week to see how im going. What a guy! So when we were talking and I told him I was going to the Temple Saturday, guess who was coming with me? It was special to have someone who's been on nearly my whole gospel journey to be there with me. I love Steve and his family and am blessed to have them in my life.

So inspired by my great and early start to the day, after dropping the girls home I flew to the shops and picked up a nice trolley full of healthy food, ready to start making these delish smoothies (yes theres been a slight delay in the "buying a nice new blender" to "using this nice new blender"). I got so much nice new foods to try, inspired by the chef that is Katie and Kemy and Karen Sue lol.

Then Honey and I were off for a roadtrip to Maleny. We stopped off at Wild Horse Mountain Lookout to see the view of the Sunny Coast and then the village at the Ettamogah Pub, there's a new age shop there I love. I found this time the best thing. So I've been looking for ages for something that represents the "Spirit" to me. I had this image in my head of a globe of light inside a little birdcage. The Spirit is bright but delicate and you must be careful and look after it as it cannot abide in unholy places and I wanted something visual to remind me of how I percieve the Spirit, to always remind me that if I want the Spirit with me then I need to focus on the holy, to remind me of the delicacy of the Spirit so as to do nothing that would drive it away. So anyways, I found it, its blown glass with a feather inside. It is just perfect.

Theres also a fudge store and an Australiana store. We got some pressie ideas for the homeward bound missionaries. We got lost and then eventually when we found Maleny we went night hiking through the rainforest and Katie, Kemy, it actually rained in the rainforest! And we saw a wallaby, kinda scary in the dark and the funniest warning sign for dropping seed pods, reminded me of the story of drop bears lol it said "Please be alert to heavy seed pods dropping from above" seriously?

Then to finish the night off, a fantastic dinner at an Italian restaurant, mmm the yummiest cream sauce and real accordians! Hanging out with the girls in the states has given me a taste for the nicer things in life. Like it was so much nicer to do that than drive through Maccas. Great day!

Friday 17/9/10 - Memory lane...

Well I spent the whole day doing my photos from the States. It was hard, but I managed to pick the top 20. I had them printed and bought new frames yesterday and they are all now up on the walls. I LOVE them. All the memories, I've been smiling and crying over all the great times I had. It's not helping with missing Utah and everyone, but I figure its like a massive goal chart. Everytime I wake up I'll see everyone and remember where I'm headed :)

Yes every piece of wall space was taken up doing it - overkill? Nahhh :) I had a great time doing it all but like I said it has literally taken my whole day. Katie, this is what you occupy yourself doing when you don't have two kids, a husband, family and work :P. I wonder if it was a waste of my day, but something I realised in Utah was that sometimes, good things take a little longer to do, and it is worth the extra time you spend doing it. It gives the task value. And it gives me patience :)

Since I wont get to talk to alot of you about my trip straight away, here's some of my story...

Photo 1 of the Top 20

(in no particular order, in fact if truth be told I probably have a top 100 rather than 20)

This is me and Lily. Lily is Katie's eldest daughter, Katie is Michael's sister and Michael is Elder Nielsen, the missionary that baptised me. Here we were in Washington, at a little cabin just outside of Forks (yes as in Twilight Forks). So this night was amazing! Not only had I spent all day with Kemy (Michael and Katie's other sister) exploring Seattle, travelled through the most amazing forests and spent another few hours driving and chatting with Katie, now I was literally experiencing dreams coming true. See these where some of things I dreamed of doing in the States...

• Sit around a Campfire


• Spend the night out under the stars


• See a real forest


• Stay in a cabin with a fire


• See farm animals


• Try Smores


• See something related to Twilight


• See an Indian Reservation

Now all of these came true this night. We arrived at a cabin to stay in for the night, which was in the middle of a forest, outside of Forks (Twilight), we'd already driven through Port Angeles (Twilight) and we were heading for La Push (Indian Reservation and Twilight) tomorrow. Not only that the house where the owners of the cabins lived was the house they based the Cullens (Twilight) home on in the movie.

Now after we arrived and Kemy and Chris (Kemy's husband) went to check in, Katie was with the kids in the bathroom and I had a chance to sit down and take it all in. That's when I realised there was a real fireplace in the cabin! Then a knock at the door and the owner was giving me some bread to feed the cows and horses with in the morning! And he said if we were interested that they put on a campfire each night for the guests and they supplied...Smores! You bet I was interested! Off we all went to sit under the stars!

So that was tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick off my dream wish list. And the amazing part of it was that I had totally given up on all of these things because I had tried to plan a tour to Yosemite which would have covered parts of the list but it was cancelled due to overbooking. So I'd put it out of my head and thought, you know, too bad. And I had totally given up on the Twilight part because I knew I wasn't going anywhere near Washington. Oh how things change :) See no matter how hard I had tried to set it up, it hadn't worked, but something bigger than me was at work and setting up something even better than what I could do. Sometimes that's the way life is.

But the most amazing part was the two beautiful friends, my "sisters" Kemy and Katie, that organised the whole thing without even knowing about my wish list. I am truly blessed to have them in my life! (and not just because they took me to Forks lol xox). So because of them I have the memory of all of the above and the photo of me and Lily is my fave and reminds me of all of this. It is dear to me because I had so many photos with Lucy (Lily's little sister) but for some reason none with Lily. And so I'd asked her to have one with me this weekend, and she said she would. But this kiddo must have been soooo tired by this night, but you know you never hear her complain. Must be the good influence of her family because she just takes life on, head on.

So we are all sitting around the fire and I asked her again and she comes over and we pose and Kemy or Katie I'm not sure, someone takes the photo and I was fully expecting her to just run off and play again, but she didn't. She snuggled in and sat with me. And I cuddled her back. And we sat looking at the fire in silence. And I loved it. Because I don't have kids, but I wish I did. And that's exactly something I would want to do with my daughter (or son, I'll take either, or both to be more accurate ;P) . Snuggling in front of a campfire, under the stars, surrounded by beautiful people, my family, feeling the love. I treasured every second of that moment, and felt very blessed to know this family and little Lily who brought me such great joy.

It makes me so very grateful to know of the Gospel. Literally if you were, interested, had the time, and or patience, I could link you back from this treasured moment to the day I met Michael on my front doorstep. Without the Gospel, I wouldn't have the hope I have for the future. The hope that one day I will experience that very same thing, with my own child. And then my joy will be complete.

Temple tomorrow! Perfection!

Thursday 16/9/10 - This changes everything again...

Today I had the best surprise. So I went to the accountant to do my tax for this financial year and last one oopsy. Anyways turns out that I get a massive tax return which nearly to the dollar will pay off the exact amount of debt I have including if I put in my savings.

Now this is great news of course. But it opens up a whole new lot of possibilities. Firstly, I have been thinking alot about my job. I'm not really into it. Nursing yes, but OT no. Its not bad, I can do it, Im good at it, but I have no passion or enthusiasm for it, and I dont want to drag my self to work for the rest of my life, I would like to work in an area that I am happy to think of spending my day in. Any of my nursing friends know that you need to have the passion for the job or you cant do it, not successfully anyways.

So I had literally yesterday made my mind up that at least for the moment a job change wasn't feasible because I needed to stay put, be sensible and pay off my debt asap. Well with no debt to worry over, now I'm free to change jobs as I please. So do I? Or do I stick out the graduate program which will be extended until March 2011 because I had the time off for the States.

I can see the benefits of sticking out the program. I get the experience, the training, the certificate, I only need to do one more communication unit and it will give me a Post Grad Cert = better pay and recognition. But does any of that matter if I'm not happy to get up each day and go to work? Does it matter if its not an area I intend on staying in long term? What do I need a post grad cert in periop services if my passion lies in aged care and education? But am I just thinking grass is greener? I know alot of people who would kill for this position. And I have struggled to find my "niche" ever since I left Aged Care, should I just stay in OT? Uhhh no even writing it makes me scream no.

For the moment anyways it's back to work next Monday, too short notice to quit now...or is it? ;p

Second piece of good news tonight was that I told my parents about my intention of moving to the States. I was so glad I followed the promptings that led to this very casual discussion over dinner. I feel much better now because plans have been moving so fast that I didnt want to have to worry about what I did or didnt say in front of them. It's much better for things to be out in the open I think. Anyways mum just wanted to know if I would move to a safe area - I told her Inglewood Katie (kidding). Dad was just about ready to pack for me i think lol. Anyways it went well which was a relief.

I got a suprise email from my friend Hollie tonight giving me a contact of an organisation that does volunteer healthcare in africa and south america and asia. See thats another reason I'm thinking I should stay in OT, for the skills I could gain and use in places like that.

Dinner

Also tonight I cooked a delish dinner inspired by Kemy and her cabin spaghetti. I was very proud of myself :p , my new knives are awesome by the way. And I bought some new photos frames for my holiday pics - now to pick the top 20!


Oh and best thing to look forward to? Temple this Saturday with my RS Presidency AND Steve Fazakerley's coming with me for my first time to the Brisbane Temple. Cant wait for that! I think with all these things floating around in my head I need the Temple :)

Brisbane Temple at night in June 2010

Monday 6/9/10 - Very last day in this beautiful country!

It's decided - I don't want to move here, I am moving here! To Utah specifically. I got my confirmation on Saturday at the Temple. It is the best feeling!

But today, I have to go home to OZ. So I left very early this morning from Lehi to get to the airport and I held it together so well till I couldnt see Carrot Soup waving anymore. Then I burst into tears. But we saw a bunch of missionaries heading out for Panama and that cheered me up. I so dont want to leave. But let me clear something up for y'all. Its not that I dont love Australia, I do, its just that I have loved this time in Utah and NEED to be here! I just know it. So, Im going to do just that, I'm going to make it happen. I have alot to organise, work, licencing, visas, accomodation etc. but Im settting my goal at one year from now. Don't worry, I will travel back and be the tour guide for everyone coming to Aus :)

So my last day will be spent in LA, I arrive at 0930 and fly out at midnight so I have alot of spare time. I have two places to see. One, Santa Monica Pier and Two, LA Temple. So I get into this taxi with the driver named David. He tries to sell me this tour of LA and hollywood etc. I told him I'd done all that and my plans. So he says "OK, everything and I wait for you, $80". Which was really good considering it was like my own personal taxi for the day! And get this... because he was waiting for me at the Temple he came into the visitors centre and watched one of the movies and wondered around and thought the Christus was amazing. Pretty cool huh. And it was beautiful the Temple and the visitors centre. Cant wait till next time when I can go inside.

LA Temple

Is this not picture perfect?

I know I am boasting but I think I did a brill job on this pic lol

Next stop was Santa Monica Pier. I got totally sunburnt, like i have a white necklace outline on my skin from where it was sitting and got burnt all round - embarrasing! See Utah sun is the only one that agrees with me. LA sun burns, so does home's lol. I'm missing everyone in Utah already, maybe it was the sun but I swear I saw Trent at the pier and had to do a double take, and then I thought I heard Lucy lol, and I keep turning around to tell Katie something but shes not there :( But all in all it was a good time.

Before I knew it, it was time to head back to my hotel and then I was off for the last time to the airport. I got there early and was one of the first to check in. Talk about blessings, listen to this.

1) I was sitting at the gate waiting and waiting, you know how it is, contemplating the fact that I was there on my own. As you know I should have been with my best friend but she changed her plans. So it was 1030 and I was so tired thinking, "Man I can't even check in yet for another hour, how am I going to stay awake?". Two seconds later I hear this voice "Alexis?". It was Denise Christie, a Sister from Northpine Ward. She's a nurse and works at my hospital too. She was in the States helping her Son and his family move back to Australia, and "conincidently" we were on the same flight home - UNBELIEVABLE!. So I spent the next hour catching up with them. Small small small world!

2) So I had two suticases (yes I accumulated an extra suitcase worth of things to bring back) to check in and one for onboard. The man checked me all in and I weighed the bags and I was fully expecting to pay for excess baggage, but he never charged me! And he asked me where i wanted to sit and gave me an aisle seat next to a vacant seat so i could get comfy. I totally expected the seat to be filled by the time it came to board because there was a sign saying this flight may be overbooked, but it stayed empty and Miss Australia here got 6 maybe 7 hours sleep! Blessings!

Tuesday 7/9/10 - MIA - missing in action

Literally, I lost Tuesday in the time change. I'm sure it was great wherever it went :)

Wednesday 8/9/10 - Home

Finally home and I feel great because I've had such a good sleep on the plane. I saw The Karate Kid, definitley recommend it. Dad picked me up. Spent the next few hours chatting away to Mum and Dad. Then it was time to hop back on the computer and see about flights to Melbourne. Somehow my day just disappeared. Time's different here to Utah I swear. Everything's different here to Utah.

Thusday 9/9/10 - Back to the plane station...

I'm off again to the airport, this time off to Melbourne. Back at the airport, it feels like I was just popping out to see mum and dad for a visit and that Utah is home and after Melbourne I'll be on my way again. Different really considering I was only in Utah for 3 weeks, yet it feels like home. Anyways only a 2 hour flight so not bad. I had some time to spare at the Airport waiting for my Aunty and Uncle to arrive off their flight, and I found these which I LOVE..and to explain, I always look for little sayings or words that are beautiful or inspiring and write them in my notebook, so this is what I found at the airport. I love the fact you can find these treasures in all places if you just look, like I said I found these at an airport.

PEACE - It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise or trouble or hardwork...it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart - Unknown

The BEST and most BEAUTIFUL things in the WORLD cannot be SEEN or even TOUCHED, they must be FELT with the HEART - Helen Keller

Well I get into Melbourne and everyone is in black! And what do I have? My Forks jumper. Ready or not Melbourne here I come. We are staying at a place called Frankston. We had pizza for dinner which was good but not like in the States. Im afraid Im going to become very annoying to all my friends and family by starting every sentence with "In the states...In California...In Utah...In Washington..." I can see the eyes rolling already lol. Tomorrow I get to see my Cait!

Friday 10/9/10 - I get to see my Cait!

Today's the big day. My cousin Cait is graduating from her Navy training. So for those who don''t know here's the story. Caitlin is my youngest cousin, but she's like my little sister, since I don't have any brothers and sisters (until recently acquired lol). She was born when I was 10 years old, so I was old enough to understand what a baby was and to help out. I remember my Aunty Carmel being pregnant and me wishing for it to be a girl. Maybe thats because my earliest memory of my other cousin Joseph, Cait's brother, was him biting me on the back when we were playing horse rides. Maybe thats why I wished for a girl :) But I got my wish. And me and Cait have been close ever since.

She's brilliant, a natural at everything she does and sooo modest about it, her Dad would always have to drag out of her to tell us what was the latest competiion or award she'd won. Good memories! So today is very special that I can be there. Im so glad I made it back in time, it wasnt planned, I booked my flight to the States and then she told me about her graduation. Coincidence that it worked out perfectly? I think not :).

So this morning I finally got to see my Cait! It was soo good, she did so well, she looks so grown up in her uniform! She's made great friends and loves what shes doing here! Since I always wanted to join the Navy I will now be living vicariously through her experiences :p

So proud of you Cait! You are an inspiration!